Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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