So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
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