I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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