this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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