You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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