I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
