oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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