i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
