these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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