I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
