There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Randomize