why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
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does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
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We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I have already put on my inside pants.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
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