Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
