it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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