I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
