Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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