I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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