I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
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I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
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I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!