And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
