The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
