i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
