Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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