her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
ttyl tear gas
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Randomize
