Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
