Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
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