tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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