She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
