Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize