I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
