i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Randomize
