Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
