Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
