I like to think it a success when the cops are called
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Please don't give away my fajitas
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
