They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
