Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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