is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
This is not my ceiling
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
