I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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