She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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