sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
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