Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
You're earring is so big in my mouth
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
