I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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