Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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