Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
