I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
