Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I intend to get homeless drunk
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
This baby is an asshole
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
