giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
