do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
