Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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