I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
