Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I hope mine doesn't look like that
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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