today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize
