he puts the penis in happiness.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
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